I have spent so many hours planning and preparing myself for events that never took place. I have rehearsed entire conversations of more than 10 exchanges of exactly what will be said in conversations that never occur. I have made plans off of ideas I thought were going to unfold but never did. And I didn’t do these things once, but over and over and over again.
Until I learned the art of letting go. And believe me, it is an art. I remember early on asking someone, how in the world do you let go? How do you just throw your hands up and say enough? I used to joke around and say if only there was a let go box up in my attic, where I could go up, write down my struggle, concern or dilemma, fold it up, put it in the box and poof, I was able to let it go. If anyone knows of such a magical contraption, please let me know!
If it’s not that easy, yet it is that easy, how in God’s green earth do you let shit go then? You learn to MYOB. And I’m not just referring to staying out of things and keeping your mouth quiet. I’m talking about staying in your lane and focusing solely on you and your car.
If you are anxious and planning future events, you know the ones that may or may not happen, then you are living in fear. You are afraid you are not going to get something you want or you are afraid you are going to lose something you have. I imagine most of you are rereading that sentence over as it takes a double go around to start processing it. And as you are, please keep in mind that it does not just mean material items. In fact, most of the time it means something internal such as validation, acceptance, praise, self reliance, self worth, or failure.
So those times (actually it doesn’t have to be in present tense as I currently am still guilty of doing it yet not as much) where I plan those upcoming events in my head and what is going to transpire, are times that I’m living out of fear. What if the person gets angry? What if it doesn’t work and I’m left holding the bag at the end? What if they ask and I have to tell them the truth? There are millions of what if’s that one can create when creating a future event. How many of them actually take place tho?
Not many, Welcome to the karma of not letting go. It’s basically the universe’s way of laughing at you and showing you the amount of time you wasted on shit that didn’t even happen. For all you nay-sayers that are about the chime in and say “I’d rather be prepared then not, any day,” I call bullshit. You’re not prepared. It is a false sense of preparation. If you were confident, secure and brave, you wouldn’t need preparation, you’d always be prepared. You’d have yourself to fall back on and get you through any what if’s that transpired.
Everything, absolutely everything in our life that causes distress or any feeling we don’t enjoy is based off of insecurities and fears. If you do not like something around you, you’re living in an insecurity or fear of something. Don’t worry tough guy, the one who is saying right now to themselves, ‘fuck that, I’m not afraid of anything’, I’m still referring to you. I am referring to any human being out there. Myself included.
And in order to move past some of them, you must learn the art of letting go. You must learn to not let others opinions weigh in more than yours. You must learn to not let mistakes and falling down stop you from trying. You must learn to relinquish that false sense of control you think you have on the world around you. You must learn to let go of people, places and situations and embrace YOU.
If you believe in yourself, if you think you are capable, it will not matter ‘what if’ that pops up over time, you’ll handle yourself accordingly. So stop living in the future, start living in today. As I posted on my Facebook page, time waits for no one. The time to act is NOW. Suit up, show up, and learn the art of letting go. I can assure you, life is that much more enjoyable when you can. You seize moments more, you pay attention to detail and you absorb all that goes on around you when you live in the NOW.
Toodles, Becca Jane 🙂